It turns out that men are just as frustrating now as they were when you first became aware of their existence. Men are ridiculously pig-headed and stubborn, because men have no idea what real strength is. Men are obsessed with size and appearence. They are inherently jealous and suspicious, ofter paranoid about relationships, and will go to great lengths to avoid commitment. You know all those childish pet habits they had that you thought would eventually grow out of? well, they dont.
Basically, they are unreliable and goofy. Because the fact is, men are not very bright. Its no wonder, then, that trying to have a quality relationship with a man can be the best way to bring on a migraine. Of course, its easy to ignore the downside and all the warning signs when an exciting new romance is just starting. At this stage, you not only accept his pointless interests, you embrace them as "cute" and "quirky." You may even try to involve yourself in his silly games to maximize "quality time" together. You'll do everything you possibly can to maintain the relationship's momentum. So you cant hear, or wont listen to, that little voice inside your head whispering "Danger, danger, danger! Loser alert! loser alert!" You dont trust your female intuition that something unpleasant is about to happen. Instead, you put all your feelings, hopes, and dreams into his hands, becoming a complete romantic martyr. And then, all of a sudden, you come crashing down to earth in the most dramatic fashion imaginable. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrggghhhhhh!!! Another nightmare relationship!! "D'oh!" .. you cant believe its happened again.
Meanwhile, my rival is flaunting more "ice" than Alaska and seems well on her way to having a dream family with perfect teeth and no body odor. Can you imagine her life???
All in all you're left feeling like you've been soaking in bathtub full of squid livers. Men, yeee-uck!! who needs them?
But is dedicating yourself to a chaste life of religious devotion, high fiber granola, and sensible underwear the only way for a modern woman to find true bliss??No, it probably isnt.
In your heart you know how life is supposed to turn out. We've all seen how Mother Nature brings two creatures together in the right place at the right time. They then fall madly in love and live happily ever after. And so you ask yourself: "if a penguin can have a worthwile, stimulating relationship, why the hell cant I?" Or maybe you ask yourself: "Would I be happier if I started dating a penguin?" This might sound like a stupid question until you wake up and realize that men and women do not always form the natural union you've been led to believe. And thus, in some cases a woman needs a man like a bear needs a bicycle. Anyway, the point is that men and women are essentially different species, which is why it can be so hard for them to stay together. Right from birth there is a small but crucial difference between men and women that becomes more obvious and intrusive later in life.
It's that men have a reduced mental capacity that warps their perception of reality and ability to reason. They have a terribly deluded sense of self-importance, which makes it very difficult for them to interact with more intelligent life-forms. In Layman's term, as a species, men are simply not as evolved as women. This is obviously the cause of the painfully backward male attitude toward relationships, which I'm pleased to say has gradually been refined over the last million years, although there is still substantial room for improvement. What men desperately need are good male role models. Sadly, there are none. Even if we could build a "perfect man" from scratch, he would still have flaws. You must embrace this fact if you wish to stay sane. In terms of strange behavior, it doesnt get much more bizarre than when a man attempts to secure a woman's romantic interest. Men have a perversely simple sexual agenda that can best be described as an overwhelming blend of vanity and urgency. "Hey, look at me."
Its not uncommon for young women with low self-esteem to find this superficial display both intoxicating and compelling. Without thinking, she dives right in to the fray with an equally superficial response. She begins to fret about her appearance rather than focus on her many outstanding qualities as an intelligent human being. (This one is for you ladies...) "Will you think i'm sexy enough?"... "Will he find me wholesome enough?"..."Is he allergic to Pink?" such concerns are demeaning and detract from what really makes a woman attractive- Confidence, intelligent, charisma, purposes, dignity, and a relaxed sense of self.
When such important principles are overlooked, a woman will try far too hard to impress her date, which can only create unrealistic expectations for future outings and be injurious to her health and reputation. One of the keys to a successful relationship is (I think! since i cannot reclaim my self as successful, Yet) knowing what you're looking for-- you might not have room in your life for a man right now. But even if you dont know what you want, you should acknowledge that and go on from there. (Men dont know what they want either, but they dont even know that they dont know. this is clearly not a good platform to build a relationship on.)
When you are evaluating a potential "Mr. Right" candidate, the only important questions are about how you feel. Do you feel special? do you feel loved and respected? do you feel that the relationship is bringin out your best?Too often women get bogged down to incidental issues, like "What is his mother like?" or "How would we look going out together?" and "How many relationship has he been in?" Wondering about such abstruse hypotheticals like "What kind of father would he be?" and "How might he look in fifty years", are really just a form of self-inflicted mental abuse. So forget about the past or the distant future. There is no way to reveal your destiny other than to make it turn out the way you want it to.
Anyway, no one can really see into the future, and anyone who says they can is not someone whom you would like to stuck next to on a long international flight. Of course, women who focus on style over substance eventually find what they want: a devilishly handsome man who is oh-so-smooth and sophisticated (my favorite word), is built like an ancient god, and is not afraid to cry during old movies. In short, an absolute angel. There's just one itsy-bitsy problem..wait till you come home to find your boyfriend trying on your underwear with his "squash buddy." Listen again to that little voice in your head "MR. WRONG" Its way too late when he starts that old "its not you, its me" waffle, or you accidentally, stumble across some unusual snapshots from his overseas "business trips" As a side note, if your man is unfaithful you can always hire a professional thug to rearrange his features,and for an additional fee, jam a walking stick up his butt. Of course, there is only one known fcure for infidelity. Take immediate action!
You only have one life to live, and the clock is ticking. You cannot afford to answer the door for every creep who comes knocking. You dont have time to chase men who arent worth catching. And you certainly shouldnt be fighting over them. You should leave that sort of unseemly and childish display to men, who have nothing better to do. But no matter what happens in your relatinships, you must never forget that falling down and getting back up again is part of life. Only you responsible for your happiness. No other person is necessary to complete you.
Think back of the times when you were truly happy--to when your felt you could do or be anything you wanted. Well, nothing has changed. The world is still the same wonderful place it was when you were a little girl. The only difference is now you are old enough, smart enough, confident enough, and strong enough to take on any challenge that life wants to throw at you and to realize your dreams on your terms.
Singapore, Farrer Park.
-On my valentine Day-
